Trust yourself. It sounds simple, but if you’re anything like the women I work with, those two words might be the hardest thing anyone has ever asked of you. You know that feeling…sitting in your life, doing the things, checking the boxes, and there’s this quiet but persistent voice underneath it all saying “this isn’t it. There’s more for me.“
Maybe you’ve felt it while you’re working. Maybe it shows up at 11pm when everything’s quiet and you can’t ignore it anymore. You have this deep knowing that you’re meant to be doing something different. Maybe it’s healing people. Maybe it’s writing. Maybe you’re creating something that doesn’t exist yet. And instead of trusting that knowing, you’ve spent months, maybe years, looking outside yourself for permission to believe it.
If you’ve read every book, taken every course, and still feel stuck at the edge of becoming who you know you are, this post is for you. Because the problem was never that you didn’t have enough information. The real work is learning how to trust yourself again, and that’s exactly what we’re going to talk about.
How to Trust Yourself Starts With Seeing the Pattern
Here’s something I want you to really sit with: you already know what you’re capable of and you’ve known it for a while.
You’ve Already Done the Searching
Think about how much you’ve already learned. The podcasts, the books on manifestation and mindset. The courses you bought hoping this would be the one that finally unlocked it for you. You don’t have a knowledge problem because I can bet that you’ve done more research than most people ever will.
And yet here you are, still waiting.
Still looking for one more sign, one more teacher, one more piece of proof before you let yourself believe what you already know.
What You’re Really Looking For
If more information would have fixed this, it already would have. What you’re actually looking for isn’t another framework, it’s permission. You’re hoping someone outside of you will confirm what you already feel so you don’t have to be the one who decides it’s true.
The Difference Between Getting Support and Outsourcing Your Wisdom
I want to be really clear about something, because this is where people get confused. Wanting support is not the problem.
Wanting to keep handing your knowing over to someone else to validate is.
What Real Support Looks Like
Support is mentorship, education and having someone reflect back what you’re already sensing so you can see it more clearly. A good coach, a good teacher, a good friend doesn’t hand you an answer you didn’t already have somewhere inside you. They help you hear yourself.
The Difference Between Getting Support and Giving Your Power Away
Giving your power away looks different. It’s the version where you keep collecting opinions because if you never fully decide, you never have to be responsible for being wrong. It’s asking ten people what they think before you’ll trust your own read on a situation. It’s signing up for one more certification before you’ll call yourself a healer, even though deep down inside you know that you are ready.
It feels safer because if it doesn’t work out, you can say someone else told you to do it. But it also means you never get to fully stand behind your own knowing. And that’s a heavy trade.
Why Trusting Yourself Feels So Scary
Trusting yourself isn’t just a mindset shift. It’s a felt experience and it can genuinely be uncomfortable in your body.
It’s Not a Confidence Problem
When you imagine fully stepping into who you’re meant to be, actually calling yourself a healer, actually putting your writing out there, actually building the thing, something in you tightens.
Maybe your chest gets tight. Maybe you suddenly feel exhausted and want to close the laptop. Maybe your body is shaky. That’s not a lack of confidence. That’s your nervous system reacting to the unknown, because being seen, especially in this way feels vulnerable.
My Own Moment of Giving My Power Away
I spent years in the salon chair building a career I’d worked incredibly hard for, one I had genuinely dreamed about. But my body started telling me something different before my mind was ready to listen. I was anxious, dropping my comb multiple times mid-haircut, my hands were literally failing me. Physical therapists told me I needed to quit. And I had no idea what that meant for my life.
What followed was years of trying to find the right next thing: health coaching, different programs, and different certifications. But underneath all of it, the core was always the same: I help women become better versions of themselves.
I just kept looking outside myself to figure out what form that was supposed to take. When something didn’t feel aligned, instead of trusting that feeling, I would sign up for another course, try something new, ask my therapist, try and get validation from family, friends, really anyone who might tell me I was making the right choice. I was hiding.
The fear underneath all of it was simple: I wasn’t good enough. I didn’t know enough. And as I type this out today, I know these statements aren’t true.
My real shift came when I started reminding my clients of something I’d forgotten about myself: you have discernment. You have the most wisdom inside of you. If something doesn’t feel right, trust that. You know your body best, always. Teaching that to other women is what finally gave me permission to believe it for myself.
How to Start Trusting What You Already Know
You don’t rebuild trust with yourself in one giant leap. You rebuild it the same way you’d rebuild trust with anyone, in small, repeated moments of following through.
Here’s where to start:
- Notice when you already know the answer. Before you ask someone else what they think, pause and ask yourself first. Write down your honest answer before you go looking for outside opinions.
- Keep one small promise to yourself this week. Pick something small and specific, then actually do it. Trust isn’t built by thinking about it. It’s built by proving it to yourself in small ways.
- Let your body be part of the decision. Notice what feels expansive versus what feels like dread. Your gut reaction usually knows before your mind has finished making its case.
- Limit your inputs. If you’re in the habit of consuming five podcasts and three books before making a decision, try one source this time. Then sit with your own response before you go looking for the next one.
- Say it out loud, even quietly. “I think I already know this.” You don’t need an audience for it. You just need to practice hearing yourself say it.
None of this happens overnight, and it doesn’t need to. Every time you choose your own knowing over outside validation, you’re proving to yourself that you can be trusted with your own life.
You Already Know
You’re not missing a piece of information. You’re not one course away from finally believing you’re meant for more. You already know. The work now is letting yourself trust it enough to act like it’s true.
If this is resonating, the Embodied Shift Method was built for exactly where you are right now.
Not to give you more information to consume, but to help you come back to the knowing you’ve been talking yourself out of. Inside TESM, we work with your nervous system so that trusting yourself stops feeling like a risk and starts feeling like the most natural thing in the world.
You’ll stop waiting for permission. You’ll stop needing five outside opinions before you’ll believe your own read on a situation. You’ll start making decisions from a place that actually feels like you, and you’ll begin building the life, the work, the identity that you’ve known was yours for longer than you’d like to admit.
You already know you’re meant for more. TESM is where you start living like it.
Learn more about the Embodied Shift Method HERE
To your next shift.
